I am wondering about if I need to confess something to my bishop. I am a young girl (14) and a few months ago I became involved with a boy in my grade(who isn’t a member of the church). We were friends earlier and we were aware that we both liked each other. We texted for only a day (i with a friends phone), and then we started emailing each other. We emailed each other for about 3 days. We mostly chatted and were very friendly with each other and it was comfortable. However, for some moments that lasted up to hours we talked about issues that should only happen in marriage (sex). We didn’t go into great detail, but we discussed the idea of it, and we gave into our carnal desires. It was very easy to do this behind a screen and I usually gave up my self control late at night. We never acted on these talks, but we discussed it. Sometimes, I would try to change the subject and leave that topic of conversation, but he kept on returning to it. Eventually, I knew that what I was doing was wrong and broke away from it and just stopped all correspondence. I felt terrible about it and have really come to regret what I did. If I could go back and change what I did, I would give anything to do it. I have repented of it and prayed and really poured out my heart to God in prayer to be forgiven. I have felt that I was forgiven at times, but I still feel guilty for it, and it seems to be eating at my conscience for awhile. I want to rid myself of this guilt and I am wondering if I need to speak to my bishop about it (like, is it serious enough for that?). Please help.
4 Responses to “I am wondering about if I need to confess something to my bi…”
Lanny Shea
2010-08-23 03:20:58
I think you should first talk to your mom and let her know what has happened and then between the two of you make the decision to go to your bishop. You did the right thing to let go of the situation and to let go of the boy. Remember your values are what hold us together when we go against them we are going against the Holy Ghost and then comes the guilt. Not fun. Good on you for holding to your values and letting go. Now let the atonement take hold of your life and lay your burden at your Savior's feet and he will heal you. Remember you were so important to him that he gave everything so that you could live... He loves you and will heal your heart and your mind. Remember what you know is true. You are a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves you and you love him. Rember, rember!!!
Richard
2010-08-24 18:52:20
It is never a bad idea to speak with your priesthood leader about your feelings. I don't condemn you for anything as who am I to judge another? I would counsel you and invite you to read D. Chad Richardson's talk entitled "Forgiving Oneself."
You should be commended for you bravery and wisdom in escaping a poor situation. If you can't get it off of your mind, it's never a bad idea to speak with your bishop. He can even give you a blessing dismissing evil around you if you need it. Than it's just up to you to learn from the experience and not get caught in similar situations again. Best of luck little sister, and remember Christ has already paid the price for your mistakes, past, present, and future. We just need to clear up those things by confessing what we need to, and learning to forgive ourselves for our mortality.
Anonymous
2010-08-25 15:15:34
A missionary hugging a bishop in Aracaju, Sergipe, Brazil.
There is nothing wrong with discussing sex but it depends on what was said and how it was discussed. Only you and the other person know exactly what took place and if you are feeling what you think may be guilt why not talk to your bishop about it? He will be able to help you identify what your feelings are and what steps if any need to be taken. It will be much easier to talk to your bishop than to continue feeling the way you do.
Diana
2010-08-23 04:53:56
Hi anonymous, First of all I would like to commend you for your efforts of not acting on your feelings. That's a good sign that you can resist temptation however do not put your self in a position like that again. Marriage and sex are sacred and you are still a very young girl. This boy is not a member of the church and he doesn't care about the standards. You have great years ahead of you and there will be time for everything. If you have asked Heavenly Father for forgiveness, you should also forgive yourself by not feeling guilty because you have not done anything wrong. But if you think that talking to your bishop will make you feel better, then go ahead and talk to him. Stay strong, don't let the devil get the best of you. God bless
You should be commended for you bravery and wisdom in escaping a poor situation. If you can't get it off of your mind, it's never a bad idea to speak with your bishop. He can even give you a blessing dismissing evil around you if you need it. Than it's just up to you to learn from the experience and not get caught in similar situations again. Best of luck little sister, and remember Christ has already paid the price for your mistakes, past, present, and future. We just need to clear up those things by confessing what we need to, and learning to forgive ourselves for our mortality.