Hi everyone. I’m an inactive member. I received my endowments two years ago and was sealed to my parents and to my wife. We have a son who was born in the covenant. In two years, my son will be 8 years old, and I want him to be baptized. The problem is that my wife is unfaithful to me and is currently with another man. We’re separated.

I feel terrible and betrayed. My son has the right to be baptized, and I don’t know what our situation will be like in the church. Will we both be excommunicated, or just her? Thanks for your help. I really need some good council.

Anónimo from Guanajuato, México.,
(Comment originally posted in Spanish)


2 Responses to “My wife and I are separated. Can my son be baptized?”


Carlos Silva
2013-10-20 20:53:22


An Apostle of Jesus Christ speaks about divorce
Hi brother. I'm very sorry to learn that you're passing through these difficulties. It's tragic when one spouse selfishly chooses to abandon another. I hope you feel God's love in your life during these difficult times. I'll certainly pray for you, brother. Your bishop could also provide you with needed comfort. Why don't you contact him?

Each person is only responsible for his or her own sins. Obviously I encourage you to repent if you've committed any sins (we all have). But it is certainly true that divorce is often driven by one selfish spouse, despite all that the innocent spouse might do to prevent the destruction of the marriage.

Your son can certainly still be baptized and enjoy all the blessings that come from being born in the covenant, even if you and your wife divorce. Furthermore, you will not be responsible for your wife's sins. As long as you are faithful to the covenants you have made (which includes returning to full church activity), you'll be exalted in the Celestial Kingdom. I know this is a time of tragedy in your life, but you shouldn't think for a second that the religious consequences of your wife's sinful choices will fall on your shoulders, or on the shoulders of your son.

Turn to Christ during these hard times by returning to His church. Christ's atonement isn't just to help us overcome sin. It also serves to give us spiritual peace in difficult, troubling times. Full participation in Christ's restored church will help you find more of that spiritual peace in your life.

Our Heavenly Father loves you so much, brother. He feels and understands your pain. Turn to him for comfort. I hope this message helps.
Pamela Bonta
2014-04-14 09:45:18
Generally speaking, people are not usually excommunicated for simply becoming inactive. If there were other transgressions that occurred, that would be up to the Bishop and other leaders to determine, but there are other sorts of discipline as well, from disfellowship to community service to a host of other things *if* warranted.

You should definitely talk to your Bishop about the situation with your wife. If he is not aware already, he needs to be, so that he can best determine how he can offer support to you and your son, and he can also be an invaluable resource when trying to plan your son's baptism in the midst of all the turmoil in your lives. I hope things work out. God bless.

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