I can’t go to the church, my family is totally against it. I’m about to turn 18, and I desired with all my heart to baptize as soon as I was old enough. Now I see how things are in my house, if I choose to baptize, my family’s going to let me down, I’ll start having troubles again with them. When Elders visited my house a few months ago (before my Mom prohibited me anything that has to be with the church) they always said I was a Gold investigator, and they saw something special in me. I certainly don’t know what they mean.

I’ve lost my testimony, I don’t read the scriptures anymore, I’ve done things I promissed God I’d stop doing. I’m questioning myself about some other things about the church. I simply don’t want to lie with this anymore.

I did love the way I felt when I knew about the church, I remember every single day I spent there, was pure happiness. My soul was freed, I felt like nothing could ever be wrong again.

I’ve been hurt by close friends, people I did trust in, hence my family, my own mother.

I simply don’t know what to do.

Somebody told me you can’t go to hell by any means. I’m always thinking about to commit suicide, so maybe I can learn about the gospel on the other side.

I don’t know what to do, I’m simply desperate. I don’t want to carry on anymore.

Anonymous from Mexico,



One Response to “I can’t go to the church, my family is totally against it. I…”


Luciano Santana
2011-11-21 00:15:35
Jesus Christ was Himself baptized in the Jordan river to provide an example for each of us. (Reflections of Christ)
Hi friend. It's good to hear from you again! I'm sorry to hear that you're facing all these troubles. This important time in your life, when you're thinking about joining the Church, should be a time of joy, not frustration.

Sometimes in this life we get into situations where solutions seem impossible. I've certainly felt that way about some of my own challenges. I've found, however, that if I try to do the right thing, sooner or later God provides a solution. It takes a lot of faith to trust in God, but He has never let me down.

I suggest, then, that once you turn 18, you move forward with your baptism. The missionaries can talk with you at church if you can't have them in your home. Start to prepare yourself now by reading the scriptures, praying daily, and going to church whenever you can. Just put your faith in God, and things will work out. I don't mean to suggest that all your problems will vanish, but you'll find the spiritual peace you need. From what you wrote, it's clear that you have experienced this sweet peace in the past. I know you can recover it.

If you're seriously considering suicide, you may be suffering from depression. Depression is a very serious illness that can be fatal. You should get psychological and medical help immediately. Why don't you try calling a crisis hotline? In Mexico, you can call 525-510-2550 when you're really struggling. Things may seem hopeless now, but they will get better. I'm certain God will provide a way for you.

I'll pray for you, brother. Best of luck.

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