Hi everyone. I’m a new member of the church, and I’ve been very happy these few months since I was baptized. I met a beautiful girl, and we became boyfriend and girlfriend. We were even planning to get married. I love her alot and I thought she loved me as well. But she decided to leave me for another man. I’ve sent messages to this girl, but she doesn’t seem to want to hear from me anymore.
I feel very sad. This was quite a tragedy in my life. I didn’t expect her to act that way, especially since we were planning on getting married. My dreams of going to the temple and being sealed to her have gone up in smoke. She’s gone to live in another neighborhood now and doesn’t come to our chapel anymore. But I do worry about what the other members of my branch might say. I’m a little bit nervous going back to the church. I feel bad about that.
Just today the missionaries came to visit me. I’ve prayed a lot, asking the Father to give me strength. I don’t want anything to drive me away from the gospel, but I’m just so sad. Hopefully someone here can give me some words of hope. Thanks.
A congregation in Los Angeles, California. Photo by Dale Wight.
Hi Frank. I'm sorry to hear that you're facing these challenges. Love unreciprocated is very painful. But if this young woman has made it clear that she's not interested in you, you shouldn't continue to pursue her. There are many wonderful young women in the church. After you've given yourself the time you need to recover emotionally, I'm sure you'll find someone who will reciprocate your feelings. You shouldn't give up on your dream of one day being sealed in the temple. You just need to find the right woman.
It would be a foolish mistake to compound one tragedy with another. You're understandably upset about what happened, and that's why you need God now more than ever. Why would you abandon your faith at the very moment you most need spiritual support and comfort?
I'm happy the missionaries continue to visit with you. It would be wonderful if you could receive additional visits from other members. Perhaps you could chat with your bishop about your desire to return to the Church. Depending on your ward's specific resources and circumstances, he might be able to assign you some home teachers as well.
In the end, though, it's not other members' responsibility to "convince" you to return to the church through frequent visits. It's your own responsibility to come back to the church. When you were baptized, you made a promise to God that you would follow Him. He has commanded us to go to church every Sunday that we're prudently able. You need to keep your promise, brother, if you hope to progress spiritually and to find the peace that comes from regular Sabbath worship.
I know God loves you and that He wants what's best for you. He's your greatest friend, especially during hard times. He wants you to come back to the church so you can begin to heal through the miracle of Christ's atonement.
Un abrazo fraternal.
Pamela Bonta
2014-06-15 18:43:46
Don't worry about what others will say, Brother. It's is, quite frankly, none of their business! You were doing exactly as we have been commanded - to find a worthy mate and get married in the temple. Isn't it wonderful that you found out *before* you were married that she was not the right on for you? :) And of anyone dares say anything to you, that is exactly what you tell them! God bless.
It would be a foolish mistake to compound one tragedy with another. You're understandably upset about what happened, and that's why you need God now more than ever. Why would you abandon your faith at the very moment you most need spiritual support and comfort?
I'm happy the missionaries continue to visit with you. It would be wonderful if you could receive additional visits from other members. Perhaps you could chat with your bishop about your desire to return to the Church. Depending on your ward's specific resources and circumstances, he might be able to assign you some home teachers as well.
In the end, though, it's not other members' responsibility to "convince" you to return to the church through frequent visits. It's your own responsibility to come back to the church. When you were baptized, you made a promise to God that you would follow Him. He has commanded us to go to church every Sunday that we're prudently able. You need to keep your promise, brother, if you hope to progress spiritually and to find the peace that comes from regular Sabbath worship.
I know God loves you and that He wants what's best for you. He's your greatest friend, especially during hard times. He wants you to come back to the church so you can begin to heal through the miracle of Christ's atonement.
Un abrazo fraternal.