I recently discovered my husband has been unfaithful. I have not approached him yet because my daughter is supposed to be babtised in a couple months and it would crush her if her dad could not do it. Since I know for a fact that he is not worthy, will this affect the validity of her babstism? Am I just as guilty as my husband if I allow him to go through with this?
2 Responses to “I recently discovered my husband has been unfaithful. I have…”
Pedro Cruz
2009-10-18 20:03:19
Hi friend. I'm so sorry to hear that your husband has been unfaithful. What a tremendous challenge. May God bless you during these difficult times.
Strictly speaking, I believe that a priesthood ordinance is not invalidated when an unworthy man dishonestly administers it, though such dishonesty must be devastating for the man's spiritual progress. This topic most often comes up in the context of the sacrament; the sacrament ordinance is not invalidated even if the young man administering it is not worthy of the priesthood he exercises. I think the same probably applies to baptism.
However, you may want to think twice about keeping mum. Your husband should not delay the day of his repentance. You and your family need to begin to heal now. I'm sure you can help your daughter get excited about having her bishop baptize her. When we are seriously sick, we need to go immediately to the hospital, or our illness may worsen. Your husband is very, very spiritually sick. Help him begin the repentance process now. Speaking with the bishop might help you get through these hard times too, not to confess any sin but to get some emotional and spiritual support.
Good luck. I hope your situation improves as your husband assumes full responsibility for his sin and begins to make things right.
Pamela Dean
2009-10-18 13:42:30
You are in an impossible situation, one you should never have been put in if your husband honoured his priesthood. This is not your sin, it is his. Allowing him to baptize your daughter gives him the falsehood that what he did was okay. And perhaps most importantly for your family, how will your daughter feel when she learns that the man who baptized her was 1. not worthy to do so and 2. cared about his own carnal desires than her spiritual progression? Personally, I would go to my bishop, tell him what my husband had done, ask him not to tell your husband who told him about the cheating, and leave it in his hands. That absolves you of any consequences. Your relationship with your daughter and your relationship with God take precedence over allowing your husband to perform a sacred ordinance unworthily.
Strictly speaking, I believe that a priesthood ordinance is not invalidated when an unworthy man dishonestly administers it, though such dishonesty must be devastating for the man's spiritual progress. This topic most often comes up in the context of the sacrament; the sacrament ordinance is not invalidated even if the young man administering it is not worthy of the priesthood he exercises. I think the same probably applies to baptism.
However, you may want to think twice about keeping mum. Your husband should not delay the day of his repentance. You and your family need to begin to heal now. I'm sure you can help your daughter get excited about having her bishop baptize her. When we are seriously sick, we need to go immediately to the hospital, or our illness may worsen. Your husband is very, very spiritually sick. Help him begin the repentance process now. Speaking with the bishop might help you get through these hard times too, not to confess any sin but to get some emotional and spiritual support.
Good luck. I hope your situation improves as your husband assumes full responsibility for his sin and begins to make things right.