“What if I Lost my Testimony…”
by -Why I go to Church
I love the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I’ve studied its doctrine, history, and culture and have come to know that it is the true Church of Jesus Christ. I know that by following Christ I can return to live with God. This knowledge, this testimony, is my most precious possession. The feelings of the Holy Ghost that I experience in the LDS Church keep me coming back for more every Sunday.
Spiritual Knowledge does not Come Overnight
Contrary to popular belief, this kind of spiritual knowledge does not always come overnight. In the Church, we customarily say “pray and you’ll know” as if God always responds instantaneously. The scriptures outline a more complex method of receiving personal responses-personal revelation-from God. “You must study it out in your mind,” God told Oliver Cowdary. “Then you must ask me if it be rightÂ…” (D&C 9:8).
God does not typically hand out personal revelation like food at a cafeteria. We have to work for it. We have to study Christ’s gospel first-we have to really dissect it-and only then will God answer our prayers and give us a sure knowledge. For some, the study period takes days; for others, years. Personal revelation requires studying whether you’re learning about gospel principles for the first time as an investigator or new member, or whether you’ve had a crisis of faith and must relearn what you once knew.
Because answers don’t always come immediately, it takes spiritual maturity to be able to put doubts on the back burner for a time, to be able to say, “Okay, I haven’t received an answer yet. I’ll keep studying and praying, but for now I’m just going to accept that I, like every other human being on the planet, do not know everything. I can wait on the Lord.” Too many people leave the church because they’ve lost or failed to cultivate their testimony; instead, they should stay in the Church, study its doctrines, and wait for God to answer their prayers in His own due time.
“If I don’t have a Testimony, Why should I Stay in the Church?”
Some who mistakenly think a testimony will never come ask why they should continue to attend church meetings. They often think there is hypocrisy in going to church or serving in a calling if one can’t say he “knows.” In reality, every member is at a different place in his or her spiritual journey. If God hasn’t answered your questions yet-if you don’t yet know-remember that the prophet Alma also praised those who “can no more than desire to believe.” The church belongs to faithful doubters as much as it belongs to faithful testifiers.
If you are questioning your testimony, keep studying, praying, and waiting on the Lord. In the mean time, remember that there are many secular reasons to remain affiliated with the Church.
The Church as a Humanitarian Organization
Regardless of whether the Church of Jesus Christ is true or not, there’s no denying that it is a humanitarian powerhouse. The Church has donated more than $1 billion over the course of the past 25 years to 165 nations around the globe. Every member who has paid his tithes and offerings is part of that miracle; I’m proud to be a member of the community, a community with a sincere desire to bless others.
The Church also affords many opportunities to serve individually, service that leads to personal growth. When I think of how I’ve grown personally through the Sunday-school lessons I’ve taught, the sermons (“talks”) I’ve preached, and the people in need that I’ve visited, I can’t imagine what kind of person I would be without the gospel of Jesus Christ. This personal growth comes through service, even if the person serving does not yet “know” that the Church is true.
Being a Member has Great Health Benefits
Did you know that scientists actually study members of the church to try to figure out why their health is so extraordinary? We have reduced death rates and increased life expectancy. Low cancer rates seem to be one of the main reasons for our longevity.
Church members have lower rates of lung cancer and disease, breast cancer, cervical cancer, ovarian cancer, cancer of the larynx, cancer of the pharynx, cancer of the oral cavity, esophageal cancer, urinary bladder cancer, stomach cancer, cancer of the colon–rectum, pancreatic cancer, heart disease, and multiple sclerosis. “Most of the differences seen in cancer incidence can be explained by our teachings regarding sexual activity and alcohol and tobacco use, but some differences (e.g., colon and stomach) remain unexplained.”
Being a member of the Church also seems to have some psychological benefits. One study found that women are less likely to be depressed than others, and members are also less likely to commit suicide.
Good for the Family
The church also has a tremendous influence on family life. Being a member of the church helps parents raise their children well. One study found that our youth were less likely to be delinquent. Another study found that, of all groups surveyed, youth in the Church had the lowest use of tobacco, alcohol, or illicit drugs. In this latter study, family church attendance during the participants’ adolescent years was “significantly protective against substance use in LDS but not among those of other religions or in those with no religious preferenceÂ…”
The church is also good for marriage. American church members who marry other members have the lowest divorce rates in the country.
So much of my relationship with my parents, siblings, and spouse is based on our mutual love for and dedication to Jesus Christ. They would love me no matter what, but just the same I would stay in the Church even If I had crisis of faith in order to preserve my unity with them.
Stay because you Love the Culture
I stay in the Church because I know it’s true, but even if my testimony faltered, I’d stay because I love the church as a cultural and ethnic way of life almost as much as I love it for its theology. I love the close families. I love the beautiful ethnic stories of visions and persecution and pioneers. I love the history, both the good and the bad. I love our music. I love the way of life associated with the Church independent of its theological truth. It’s so important to belong to a community, and the community is a wonderful one.
Conclusion
Friends, if you feel that your testimony is weak, whether you’re an investigator, a new member, or a member who’s undergone a crisis of faith, I invite you to study the doctrine and to ask God if it is true. In God’s own time, He will answer that important question. In the mean time, stick with the Church. There are so many wonderful reasons to be an active, practicing member of the church!
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